When my husband passed away, the last thing on my mind was cooking.
A friend of mine, who had lost her 15 year old son just three months before my husband passed away, offered to come and cook for me.
To say I was shocked is an understatement. I knew she was going through the unimaginable pain of losing her own son, and yet she was generous enough to offer this.
She offered because she knew
Then I realised something. She offered because she knew.
She knew that when you lose someone, your life goes on hold for at least the first two weeks.
The same friend then offered to drive me to the crematorium on the day of my husband's cremation. Again, because she knew I wouldn't be able to drive myself.
As it turned out, I did manage to drive myself there. But not back. Luckily, my family was with me and drove me home, because what happened to me during the cremation is not something I can simply describe in words.
The first aid you can offer
So the reason I am writing this is simple. If you, or someone you know, is going through this right now, this is the first aid you can offer:
Cook for them, or send them a meal. In those first weeks, food is the last thing on a widow's mind.
Be with them. Your presence matters more than finding the right words.
Support them as much as you can.
Drive them wherever they need to go but simply can't manage on their own: the crematorium, the cemetery, the embassy, the court.
Free journeys for newly widowed women
We are lucky to have partnered with Ride Skipper, who generously offer newly widowed women in the UAE a free journey when they are arranging a funeral or cremation, or need to reach their embassy. To arrange a journey, email hello@hersphere.ae. Please share this with anyone who might need it.
Calling food businesses
If you own a food business and would like to make a real difference in people's lives at the most unimaginable time of their lives, we are looking for you. Please get in touch with me at hello@hersphere.ae.
The Widow's Guide walks you through the practical steps after losing a husband in the UAE, from the first 30 days to the first six months.
Join the HerSphere UAE Facebook group, where I share practical information for women rebuilding their lives here, and where you will find others who understand. Join the HERSPHERE FACEBOOK GROUP
